Our Imperfect Lives


Rooms Ready and Waiting

We’re not good at waiting. And it’s kind of unfortunate since we’re probably going to be doing a lot of it in this stage of the adoption process, so we’re keeping busy. Very busy. This week we spent almost every evening working late into the night preparing the rooms for our future, yet to be determined children. There was painting and staining to be done, furniture to be moved, and art work, lighting and doors to be hung.

In reality these rooms probably won’t be filled for some time yet, but it’s best to be prepared. And boy do we like to be prepared. We did make our first inquiry last week, we inquired about a sibling group of three and the children’s social worker requested our home study. However, we haven’t heard anything back but our social worker will be following up today. We’re trying to be cautiously optimistic.

All of our time and effort really paid off, at least we like to think so. The rooms look great, albeit they aren’t quite finished. We still have some small things to take care of like installing the toe rails along the edge of our beautiful new wood floors (which we of course installed ourselves), some baby proofing and other tidbits.

One of the rooms is currently set up for a small child, perhaps aged three to six, and it has a sea theme complete with blue fish decals swimming across the room. The other room is ready to be home to an infant or toddler and has a forest theme packed full of woodland magic including a wall of birch trees and a stuffed hedgehog.

 BabyBlueBedroom2Sea Room View 1Forrest Room GreenBedRoom

Of course, if we are fortunate enough to be placed with a sibling group of three we’ll either have to convert our spare room/ office into a third child’s bedroom or invest in some bunk beds. Hopefully we’ll have enough notice before the child moves in to make those changes, but if not, the queen bed in the spare room will work in a pinch – at least for a few days.

Once this bedroom project is completely finished we’ll be on to yet another project to keep us busy and not too obsessed with all of the waiting.


Paper Pregnant

We’re paper pregnant! That is to say we completed our home study, had it approved by the area office supervisor and signed all of the necessary paperwork to become officially eligible to be placed with a foster/pre-adoptive child/children. And it’s equally terrifying and exciting!

Now that we’re officially a home studied family we have more access to the child listings on the MARE (Massachusetts Adoption Resources Exchange) website. Previously we only had access to children chosen for the public page. However, as a home studied family we can read about many more children that need homes. We didn’t waste anytime and started searching our expanded list right away.

The sheer number of the children in the DCF system with the goal of adoption is heart wrenching and the thought of searching the list like a department store catalog is a little weird and a bit sad, but it’s exciting too. One of these children or sibling groups could be “the one.” In the time it takes for us to be placed with and legally adopt a child or sibling group we’re probably going to have inquired about a lot of children and viewed the profiles of even more but we know somewhere in that database is or will be the missing part of our family.

In our first night of pursuing the listings we found a few children that seemed like they might fit what we’re looking for. The listings only give us a quick snap shot of the child – even less that your typical online dating profile – so it will be difficult to tell for sure if they’re right for us without speaking to the child’s adoption worker and then the child. After looking for a bit we decided to inquire about a sibling group of three children, two boys and a girl, all of whom are under 4 years old.

In order to inquire about these three children we simply just shot an email off to our social worker who in turn emailed the social worker for these children. In all likelihood we won’t hit one out of the park our first time up to bat, so we’re still going to keep our eyes on the list of children. The children we inquired about are young and have only mild emotional needs, so there are probably many inquiries being made. Not to mention we may not be the right family – the social worker may prefer to place the children in a Hispanic home or perhaps a home without pets, or perhaps another family is just a better fit.

We can’t say for sure how long it will be until we get that phone call that says we have a match and we won’t know for sure if once we get that phone call it will work out, but we’re going to stay positive. And until then we still have plenty of projects around our house to keep us busy as we enter this next phase of our journey.